There are days I just don’t feel like writing

Or “How I’m keeping my promise to myself that I’d write every day while still something something words. I’m not feeling well, I’m tired, and I’m grumpy, damn it.”

There are days I can’t stop myself from writing. If I did stop, I know the worlds and their respective characters would build up to the point my head would break open and let those many oddities spill out. The whole thing would be a terrible mess, really, so I choose to write instead. However, and despite my best efforts, there are still days something in my brain just says how this writing just isn’t working out. At all.

This is one of those days, and it’s probably one of the biggest bothers I know. I hate it, because I could easily justify skipping sleeping, meals, and social obligations (and if you’re one of my closest friends, you’d be the sort of person who would understand and encourage such unfortunate binge-writing sessions). If I didn’t get so damned loopy after going a day without sleep, I think my choices would be obvious here.

Naturally, today’s one such day where I can’t seem to get any creative thoughts. They’re on hiatus, maybe. Or perhaps they’re waiting for later on, once I go to bed, which is not a thought I’m entirely okay with given my subconscious’ tendency to go all-out with nightmares. No, thanks.

On the plus side, and perhaps this is some misplaced optimism of a sort, I don’t feel burnt out yet. I’ve been writing, even if only just a little, every day since I made the promise to myself I would, and I’m still feeling pretty good about that. I’m not getting anywhere in terms of publishing yet, but I will.

However, I should be getting some sleep because I’m sick. Not until I pick which Hogwarts house I’d reside in, though. Priorities, people. I’ve got serious priorities.

Revisiting the frozen north, and thesis seminar presentations

Or “I named the MS Word file ‘edinboro_nostalgia’ because I couldn’t think of a better title, as evidenced by the title of this post.”

It’s been a while since I’ve posted, but I think this bit of writing speaks well enough for itself. Also, it’s been an atrocious day and I’m feeling lazy (so sue me). Unrelated aside: The Bloggess followed me on Twitter today, which makes today the starstruck equivalent of Christmas.

Moving along…

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The conundrum of dividing chapters

Or “At least I didn’t just name this post ‘The chapter conundrum,’ despite my love of all things alliterative (oh god, I did it again)”.

There are plenty of elements to writing that could potentially bug the shit out of me, but only one particular thing consistently irks me. Dialog is easy enough, in a pinch, in terms of making sure characters don’t all sound the same (and in the event little bits of the narrator’s voice bleeds through, there’s always editing to fix that). World-building is time-consuming, and can be a tough, but necessary, evil.

I absolutely hate coming up with the right places to start and end chapters, because I almost never feel like they’re organic (and when I do, it’s because I’ve managed to set up a system of “oh-no-what-now? cliffhangers to be directly followed by the starting point of the previous problem’s resolution). Let’s just get this out of the way now: I’ve started drafting another novel idea I had some time ago (tentatively titled The Devil Made Me Do It), before Joshua’s Nightmares even crept into the creative areas of my brain (the existence of which can be debated, of course), and I find myself butting heads with the very issue of wanting to shift the focus of the story ever so slightly, but not enough that I feel like it’ constitutes a chapter change. This is how I’m choosing to occupy my time between short stories (or, more likely, punctuated by short stories as I work on this) while I wait for the last bits of critiquing to wrap up on Joshua’s Nightmares. 

Did I mention it’s only two pages and a paragraph into the story? Because that’s certainly a factor in all of this. Also, I suppose it couldn’t hurt to add a page to the top of Misadventures in Fiction to offer a synopsis of The Devil Made Me Do It.

The story begins focusing on the main character going through his morning routine, focusing on certain aspects of it being entirely unremarkable. I want to shift to another character (consider the title) and focus on his typical morning. The two narratives eventually come together, of course, but I’m really fighting myself on if I want to have a two-page-and-a-paragraph first chapter or not, and how to properly handle this situation. What similar issues do you, fellow writers, run into?

If nothing else, this post should confirm something I already knew: I have a serious writing addiction, and I’m completely okay with that.

The Old Castle on Meridan Street

This short story was, in some way or another, a-brewin’ in the depths of my brain, and possibly somewhere deep down in that little, cranky dark place I occasionally refer to as my heart. My recent trip home for Easter, a short story my friend Lindsey had me read, and my own recent reflecting on the Pittsburgh area were apparently the necessary catalysts to bring this out.

I’ve not seen my grandmother’s house since the last time my family was there to pack things up and move her in with us. A lovely family moved in, and apparently it’s changed quite a bit. There’s something about that I can’t actually cope with, so I’ve stayed away.

Anyway, I’ll stop lollygagging and get to the important part: the story, which is titled “The Old Castle on Meridan Street”. This story took several emotionally-draining hours to write, and it made me feel a curious mix of nostalgic joy and sadness. I hope it translated into some good writing. Enjoy, and feel free to share similar locations from your past that have left permanent impressions on your heart in the comments.

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Reviews shouldn’t be some twisted means of revenge

Or “It took me way longer than it should have to come up with a title for this post because I’m just really pissed off.”

I think it’s safe to say that there’s at least one special someone in everyone’s life who manages to draw a certain level of rage, no matter what they do, for whatever reason. I know I have my fair share of such people. The sort of folks I make genuine efforts to avoid in public places, or make rather unkind comments about when I’m feeling particularly unkind (read as: far too often, probably). However, despite my ever-questionable moral compass, I have some limitations. For example: I would never, ever do something to deliberately harm another person, no matter how angry I am. I use the term harm in this case, because it encompasses so many different things one person can do to something else (another person, an animal, inanimate objects; whatever). Continue reading

Let the nail-biting…begin.

Or “I haven’t sent anything out for publication consideration for far too long, and now that I have I’m nervous.”

It would be quite accurate to say I’ve been keeping myself busy with writing since the start of 2014. I’ve churned out hundreds of pages (somewhere upwards of five hundred now, actually), which is exciting, but it is by no means a reflection of how good the writing is. Or isn’t. My goal of seeking publication isn’t exactly a secret, in the sense that I’ve practically taken over a major cable channel to broadcast that tidbit at all times possible (except from 3a.m. to 5:30a.m., because everyone knows those times belong to the infomercials). The writing side of things has gotten to be second nature, but the seeking publication parts are still murky waters for me. Self-published work aside, I’ve got three by-lines to my name. Related: my god, I’ve not used that phrase since my days at Point Park. Anyway, there’s my Wreck-It Ralph review, there’s the extended non-fiction piece on modern sword collectors (which isn’t exactly readily available for people outside of Edinboro University), and “The Glasmoor Beldam” (not available yet).

Needless to say, I want to get more things published. However, I’m also bad at sorting those bits out. I know, I know. If I had as much drive for figuring out the best approach to getting published as I do for excusing my nervousness about publishing, I’d have a bazillion titles out there for people to enjoy. I’m all too aware of this.

I broke out the external hard drive (which is named Heart of Gold, because why not?), dusted off Death at Teatime, and found a magazine. A copy of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy would come in handy about now, though I imagine I would still fail to follow its advice to not panic.

Now I play the waiting game. Fingers, toes, and other applicable appendages crossed. Here’s hoping Death at Teatime has finally earned a home somewhere.

A necessary bit of the heebly-jeeblies

Or “I don’t care if you think that’s not how it’s spelled, Chrome; I’m calling them the heebly-jeeblies” and “It’s open-window weather, which means it’s time to think creepy thoughts and deprive myself of sleep.” This post was brought to you in part by me posting a picture of Horrifying Houseguest (also known as Shadowlurker) on Facebook. Take a moment and Google it.

There’s a small, twisted part of my brain that is actually pretty okay with being scared. Plenty of things scare me, and I’d be willing to guess if you’re a living, breathing person, reading this post, there are plenty of things you are scared of as well. I’m not talking fear of rejection or how any college graduate is (reasonably) scared out of their minds about student loan debt. I’m talking about the things that occupy the space just in the corner of your vision, lacking clarity but still holding enough form to unsettle. The serial killers who may or may not be lurking in your basement this very moment, waiting until the lights are out so they can make their move. The creepy creatures who you might catch glimpses of just as you drift off to sleep.

You get the idea. Everyone’s afraid of something different, too, which is truly interesting. In terms of pants-wetting, high-pitched-shrieking terror, few things creep me out as effectively as distorted human faces and forms. I’ve got a rudimentary understanding of the psychology behind it; how something familiar, twisted, is a reasonable trigger for fear. It’s how horror movies manage to scare the bejeezus out of me when nasty specters with blacked out eyes and elongated mouths fly out of nowhere (jump scares are to horror as puns are to humor, as far as I’m concerned). Even though I can rationalize and dissect what about those things creeps me out, they still (almost) always manage to get my heart racing. It’s why much of what is featured in creepypasta stories (why, yes, I have read various creepypasta stories, and feel no shame in admitting it; some of them are pretty damn scary) manages to creep me out so much.

In any event, it’s been a fun night of thinking about scary stories, and the creepy things that inhabit them, and so I figured I’d write a post. Naturally, I must pose this question: what scares you? Name some of the things that really get your hair standing up on end, make your heart beat a little faster, and are cause to run to turn the lights on the moment you enter a room. Maybe sharing some of your favorite things that go bump in the night will discourage them from visiting? Or maybe it’ll just draw them a little bit closer.

Oh, and remember: it’s silly to be afraid of the dark, but perfectly reasonable to be afraid of what the darkness may conceal.

The age-old question: why do you drive on the Parkway and park in the driveway?

Or “I had no idea what to name this, but I’m waxing oddly nostalgic about things and couldn’t justify proper story-writing this weekend for some reason.” Or “Here’s a driving/travel post because I’m visiting Carnegie for Easter.”

Once upon a time, a long time ago in my grandmother’s dining room, the title of this post was posed to a much younger me. Mrs. Ott, a friend of my Grandma June, asked me this question, and I had no idea how to answer it. Sure, there are plenty of answers I have for it now, and I’ll get to those. However, I want to address the Parkway itself, first, because I get oddly sentimental over things that probably don’t merit such strong emotional responses. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve said that, I’d be significantly more well-to-do than I am now. Continue reading

Fickle Fate

Or “I was feeling lazy and never got past the working title, but it’s been a bad day so have some excuses for my laziness.”

This started off as a joke in a conversation with my friend Lindsey, who is an entirely remarkable writer, and it escalated into this short story. Enjoy. Warpt Factor 6 should be happening sooner than later at this point, but we’ll see where the rest of the week takes me.

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