Tag Archives: writing

Still living out of boxes and bags

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff

I’m officially moved in and renting like a proper twenty-something with a degree.  I’ve been officially moved in since the 16th of last month, but it’s been a very busy couple of weeks in a number of ways.  To be fair, this is the first time I’ve really up and moved anywhere beyond the to-and-from of college, and it’s been an experience to say the least.

Central Pennsylvania is absolutely beautiful.  I mean this in the scenic, could-be-on-postcards sense.  I think that’s what makes the trip between Pittsburgh and here so tolerable.  Lots of mountains and trees and so on.

What I’d like to say is I waited to post until I could boast I survived my very first rent payment.  This is partially true.  It’s more of a “I’m still adjusting to the new location, both in terms of living situation and job” thing, really.  This post is really just an excuse to write again, because I’ve been doing a lot of joking about how I’m doing such a great job lately of making use of my higher education in writing by doing no writing at all.  I could list the excuses of being tired and busy and so on, but I can’t really consider those valid excuses at this point in time.

Oh.  And I’m still looking out for any eccentric billionaires who would like to make me extraordinarily wealthy on some impossible to explain personal whim.  Any takers?  No?  Worth a shot.

Unwanted, previously unplanned, hiatus

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff, Posts of a Rant-like Nature

Life lessons, I’ve found, are the sort of things that sneak upon me, tap me on the shoulder, then hit me over the head with large, usually blunt, objects.  Sometimes I come away from such events with a fresh, new view on some aspect(s) of my life.  Or a greater appreciation for what I have.

And sometimes I go away from them understanding why I have developed a taste for single barrel whiskey.

For instance: moving out for the first time since going to college is actually a pretty involved and taxing process.  It could be that way because I have spent a fairly substantial amount of time at work, which gave me enough leisure time to eat and sleep in less-than-equal measure (spoilers: a three hour nap between shifts does not constitute a full-night’s rest).

Short version: I’m pretty well burned out from taking on weird, longer-than-expected shifts at work and trying to pack my stuff up for moving it two hours east.  Not a huge move, but let’s all take a moment to consider how I am made up of 10% planning and 90% crippling neuroses.  I would say 25,000% neuroses, one for each year I have been alive, but I’m told by people with a higher-than-my-basic grasp of mathematics you can’t actually exceed 100%.  Which is horseshit.  Moving along…

I’m forcing myself to take an official hiatus until my move happens and I’m at least somewhat settled in.  From there, and getting my new schedule, I’m going to work on making time for actual, proper writing, instead of excusing myself for choosing sleeping over creating (when it could have been the other way around, really).  Through the magic of scheduling posts, this should be appearing on the 12th.  My laptop will, at that point, be two hours away from me because I don’t feel like hauling it back and forth one more time when I will be needing all the space I can use in my car.  It will provide invaluable insulation to keep in the streams of expletives I will no doubt be spewing by the time I reach the seventy-mile line of traffic leading to the Squirrel Hill Tunnels (and if you have ever driven the Parkway East or West in/around Pittsburgh, during any point near rush hour, you are probably nodding in agreement because A TWO LANE HIGHWAY THROUGH A MAJOR CITY IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE A SHITTY IDEA).

Thanks to my regular reader(s) for their patience, apologies to newcomers who might think I’m the flakiest writer in the blogosphere (and can we all just agree that’s a terrible word, because it is), and hopefully I won’t manage to drive off the road in a way that ends in a Michael Bay-esque explosion during my actual move this Friday.

Next post, after this one, should arrive from historical Hollidaysburg.  Unless I decide to post something from my phone between then and now, effectively making this line into a lie.  Potentially scandalous content?  Who knows.

The Good, the Bad, and the Additional Misadventures

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff, Misadventures in Non-Fiction

First and foremost, I’d like to take a moment to celebrate how the next four days are my own little mini-vacation.  Mini-cation?  Whatever.  The important take-home point is I don’t have to work the next four days.  Huzzah!  A recap of my recent misadventures, and some more writing-related stuff (which coincides with a lot of boring, non-writing stuff, I’m afraid).

First, we have the Good.  Finally, after much scheduling and rescheduling hijinks on my part, I’ve interviewed Hello, The Future about her album Giant Robot Album, which is kind of a big deal.  The album far more so than the interview.  I’ll be making a post surrounding that, which can be expected by some point on Monday.  That way I can do the post justice.  And still manage to cater to having a house full of guests.  The house full of guests is part of another good thing, however, since it’s a bunch of relatives here for the express purpose of celebrating my not-so-recently married cousin’s wedding (reception).

The Bad…Last week, I worked seventy-eight and a half hours.  Overall, I worked sixteen days straight.  These are things I was not quite prepared for, though I do have serious doubts there is an effective way to prepare for such things.  Some days I worked nine hours.  Some I worked over sixteen.  Mostly, I ended up completely burnt out, which isn’t really productive for someone who is both trying to be creative.  Or pack everything he owns for a move that is rapidly approaching.  I also had to have my dog Missy put to sleep this past Wednesday, which was, and still is, extremely painful.  There’ll be a post to follow this one in which I get a bit emotional and miss my puppy.

Thankfully, things seem to be calming down to the point where I can at least start trying to plan out uses for time other than working and sleeping (today, by the way, was spent finishing an overnight shift, sleeping, and then working again, so that doesn’t count).  I should clarify that I’m very happy to have a decent-paying job with all the benefits it comes with, as I’m aware I am indeed fortunate in that sense.

In any event, at least I didn’t accidentally fall off of the planet or something.  I’m sure I’ll manage that at some point later.

I’m not actually dead, I promise

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff

I just seem to have fallen off of the face of the planet because I sort of did for a bit there, and it was mostly because I have (pause for dramatic effect) burned myself out quite thoroughly.

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to participate in Relay for Life, and it was an entirely spectacular experience.  Alternatively, I also worked a seventeen hour shift not that long ago and I am still, in fact, recovering from it.

Basically, I need to let myself slowly revive because I can’t produce anything when I have no creative drive whatsoever.  It seems like a really obvious thing there until you’re trying to ignore that problematic bit of information by, say, insisting on continuing a very work-heavy project while putting in around 50 hours a week.

The plan from here: Short Story a Week will receive a reboot at a point I’ll figure out later.  Since it’s being rebooted, it will start back at Story Number 1, which is painful to think about right now.  However, it was an amazingly fun challenge until everything suddenly went belly-up and starting stinking of failure, so I stand by my desire to make that happen.

The interview with a musician has been postponed (clearly) because of scheduling difficulties, in that I apparently retained nothing from my brief stint as a journalist..

Oh, and then there’s the whole “working on getting ready to move out on my own for the first time” thing going on in August, when I’m moving to Hollidaysburg.  Exciting stuff.

However, I have had a dreadful, awful, miserable bad day today, and so I am due for some Netflix and Animal Crossing: New Leaf therapy.

Catching up at my own rate

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff, Short Story a Week

I feel a bit lazy admitting this, though I feel that could be laziness misplaced by my not feeling like writing today, but the Short Story backlog will probably grow a little more.  Just a little.  There’s a bottle of bourbon and a shiny new copy of Animal Crossing New Leaf calling out my name, and my day off has very politely requested, in the form of perpetual sleepiness, that it is a day off of everything.  And so it goes, right?

However, I am not without good news.  Far from it, in fact.  I have decided, in the spirit of at least keeping my Short Story a Week project news kind of up-to-date, to share the topics.  I know.  News of earth-shattering importance, of course.

The short story from two weeks ago (I know, I’m doing rubbish) is tentatively titled “The Feeling of Falling” and takes place on an orbital colony built in the heart of Jupiter’s massive, never-ending hurricane.  The other missing short story is about an AI who becomes self-aware, then speaks out on the news about how he (and his fellow self-aware computers) just want to fit in.

I also have another something on the way that I won’t announce beforehand (I know, that’s really awful of me, but the wait will be completely worth it).  I will admit it’s an interview with someone who happens to be a musician, and I am truly happy to have such an opportunity to feature it here.  The rest will have to wait until some point next week.

With that all being said, I have a bottle of 1792 Ridgemont Reserve waiting impatiently.

Oh, and one other thing before I forget: for those of you who haven’t, it’s a pretty good idea to go check out Full Blown Cranium’s debut album, “Cacophony of Weirdos”.  Click here, then follow the respective iTunes or Amazon links.  If you’re not fully convinced this is a great idea simply by me saying it is, check out the previews of each song (available on iTunes; possibly on Amazon, but I don’t actually use Amazon Music so I can’t say for sure).  I could have just as easily linked to the iTunes and Amazon stores respectively, but I also whole-heartedly recommend checking out Eric’s blog as well.

New stories soon (I promise), an AWESOME interview with an artist who will be revealed then so you can go buy even more great music, and more of my usual shenanigans, because without my misadventures this page would just be “in Fiction”, and that’s not as catchy.

 

More misadventures in non-fiction, self-reviving, and so on

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff, Misadventures in Non-Fiction

I’m two weeks behind, technically, on my Short Story a Week project.  Again.  I say technically because I have the stories, and they’re pretty well fleshed out in terms of their ideas.  I just need to write them.

Worthy of noting at this point: I worked approximately 100 hours between last week and the week prior, and so I’m  still recovering a bit.

As for the misadventures in non-fiction?  This past Thursday, after my 2p.m. to 10p.m. shift, I stopped by my house and packed some things up, stopped by my place of work again to fuel up the car, and then I embarked on my very first major highway trip.  To put this into perspective, I have only driven on the highway twice before.  Once was on Black Friday, in 2012, as a cruel joke played on me by my driving instructor, who prefaced the outing by asking if I was feeling adventurous.  I was not, and did not appreciate where things where going at that point, but I clearly didn’t do too badly in the sense that I didn’t crash.  The second time I drove on the highway was a practice run, with my stepfather, and that went relatively well in the sense that most of the trip involved me driving well.  My initial merging onto the highway, however, was absolute shit and something I’m not particularly proud of.

The actual trip was quite enjoyable.  Traveling from western Pennsylvania to central-ish Pennyslvania involved a fair bit of mountains, and a lot of very nice landscapes.  If I weren’t more concerned with the destination, I may have taken time to stop, appreciate the scenery, and take pictures, but that’s still a possibility.

Driving home today to handle an eight hour shift at work, however, was far less exciting.

Stories will be arriving between Wednesday and Friday, only for the sake of making sure I do them justice, and I should be back on track for this upcoming Sunday.  So that’s a plus.

Some misadventures in non-fiction

Posted on by under Misadventures in Non-Fiction

I’m going to just go ahead and say this week’s post will be delayed, because it evolved into something bigger than it should have.

Oh, and I worked twenty-three and a half hours between yesterday and today, and I’m also in the process of celebrating not dying or killing anybody by drinking half a bottle of wine.  Yes, you read that right.  Half a bottle.  No, this isn’t a regular thing.  In my defense, it’s Moscato, which I’m told is Italian for “liquid candy that produces great happiness” and not “wine you should be enjoying in moderation.”  So at least I have that going for me at this point in time.

Speaking of time, and not in the Doctor Who sense (well, maybe a little), tonight marks the fifteenth anniversary of the tornado that hit Mount Washington* (located in scenic Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, where I have lived all my life in some capacity or another).  To commemorate that, I will share the story of how my grandmother nearly died in the previously mentioned tornado, and how my stepfather and I made the remarkably bad decision to try driving to the site of a major storm to pick up my grandma and great aunt.

My Grandma Betty was very fond of watching storms.  When she lived at her house in Mount Washington, she would sit out on her porch to enjoy them.  Later in life, when she had moved in with my mom, stepdad, sister, and me, she continued this tradition via the two skylights in her bedroom, an entire section of the house we had added on for her.  Today, fifteen years ago, my grandmother sat out on her porch with a paper plate loaded with Lay’s Classic Potato Chips.  And she watched.  Eventually, or so say some of her neighbors who had looked out, the chips started swirling around in a circle on the plate.  The winds were getting worse, and the rain was coming down quite heavily, so my grandmother made her way to the front door.  She pulled the screen door open, only to have it slammed shut by the gale force winds.  She tried a second time, only to be met with the same results.  Finally, I’m told, she braced herself between the screen door and the larger, heavier storm door, got it opened, and made her way inside.

The porch roof dipped, collapsing completely on the one side moments later.  I still get chills thinking about that now.  She retrieved my great aunt Renee and went down to the basement.

Meanwhile, I was kneeling on one of the living room couches, watching the pitch-dark clouds drift lazily across the sky.  I still remember how the streetlights were on and everything seemed so surreal, and that’s when my stepfather asked me if I wanted to go see if Grandma Betty (my mother’s mother; I suppose I could have clarified this point sooner, but I have now so that works as well) and Aunt Renee were okay.  I agreed, more than eager to have a visit with my grandmother.  And, of course, I thought I’d get to see a real tornado, up close and personal.  I was not a very bright child.

As my stepfather drove, the sky grew darker the closer we got to Mount Washington.  That didn’t deter us, though.  We were adventurers, braving the elements to rescue two little old ladies in distress.  What could possibly go wrong?  It took arriving at a police barricade for the right thoughts to click in the right way in our heads.  I remember looking to my stepdad and saying, “Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea.”

My favorite bit to tell, however, is this part.  We had a lovely above-ground swimming pool at my grandmother’s house.  I had a lot of great times in that pool, and also one time I jumped onto a raft that flipped over and nearly drowned my wild and crazy self.  The tornado picked up our entire cinder block garage, moved it about ten or so feet back, and deposited it onto the swimming pool.  Save for the garage door, though; to this day, nobody knows where the hell that ended up.

It’s weird to think back on all of this, especially since it still feels like a painful length of time too long since my grandmother (and great aunt) passed away.  On those nights I’m home and it’s storming, I make it a point to lay down on the floor in the back room.  No lights on.  Just the occasional flashes of lightning to illuminate the room and the sounds of the rain against the skylights mixed with the rumbles of thunder.

*As of when I started writing it, mind you.

Doing adult stuff still feels foreign

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff

This post’s alternative title would be “My laptop’s mouse is trying, rather successfully, to piss me off.”

As I’ve mentioned lately, I’m working my first-ever full-time job with a big-name company that has grocery store chains and gas stations and so on (and is actually quite terrific to its employees, which is a very new, exciting, refreshing concept for me).  Today’s mail featured my first-ever statement from my 401K, shredded courtesy of the United States Post Office.  I also got my first-ever dental coverage card in the mail this week.

Those two things still sound weird to me, because they’re still filed neatly in a corner of my brain under the label “Adult Stuff”.  No, not that sort of “Adult Stuff”, and don’t lie and say that phrasing didn’t make you think of explicit content because it honestly reads like I’m talking about porn.  Whatever.  Moving along.

I also wanted to post saying how I have mixed feelings about this week’s Short Story a Week story.  It’s a fun concept, but I feel like I may be overreaching my grasp on it.  Who knows?  Guess that’ll have to wait until Sunday to be sorted out.

What I’ve been up to (other than short stories)

Posted on by under General Bloggity Stuff, SRS BSNS BLAHGING

I feel like this blog has been neglected in the sense I’ve only been going from short story to short story with less of my typical commentary, which sort of detracts from my overall misadventures in fiction being posted.  And that defeats the real purpose of this blog/web site/whatever, which is to broadcast my rampant narcissism across the internet.  Obviously.

So I’m still adjusting to my very-first full-time job at a place I won’t refer to by name so as to not, you know, get in trouble.  I’ll be honest, though; I love it.  It keeps me busy, and it’s a lot to get used to, but I’m already very happy with the way things are run.  I also have an amazing boss (who has an amazing boss as well, who I have talked to on a few occasions).  However, getting used to forty hour weeks after working sixteen hours one week, thirty-some another, and so on, is a bit taxing.  By a bit I mean a lot.

On top of all of this, I have lots going on that I’m not quite willing to reveal yet as it’s all still very much in the works.  Things I can say, at least: I’ve started keeping notes in my Hobbit Moleskine about my (Un)expected Journeys, and whether or not that ends up manifesting as Misadventures in Nonfiction or something will remain to be seen.  I also am now the proud owner of a Hyundai Sonata, courtesy of my parents’ tremendous generosity.  It also means more responsibility, which is something I was unaware I had so we’ll see how that goes.

I should like to point out I’m not dead, homeless, in some really horrible state, or anything like the previous, so I’m doing pretty damn well, all things considered.  I say that ignoring the way I worry myself to the point of health problems, of course, and those are all things I will never likely post about in great detail on here because reasons.

Lastly, I wish you all a happy Memorial Day, and offer up some serious digital high-fives and salutes for everyone who has ever fought on behalf of the US (or any other country, or for any cause no matter how big or small it may be perceived for that matter).  To see people exhibit such courage in any situation still renews what faith I have in the human condition, and that’s a hell of a feat in itself.

Short Story a Week 3 – Ye Old Scheduling Conflicte

Posted on by under Uncategorized

Ye Olde Scheduling Conflicte

King Andral groaned a standard, highly regal groan.  He was seated, as he always found himself at half past noon, upon his throne.  The Royal Advisor, who had stepped away to fetch the Royal Schedule, was taking a little longer than expected.

The king reflected on how he should have just kept his grand vizier around.  Yes, the man was highly unstable.  Perhaps even a touch homicidal, the king recalled, as the number of Royal Food Tasters who had dropped dead of “a troublesome case of not being reverent enough of the king’s meals” had sky-rocketed.  However, he always got the Royal Schedule in a timely fashion.

Normally, the schedule was fairly standard.  The start of each week alternated between threats of invasion and conquest by neighboring kingdoms and threats of domination and destruction by warlocks, demi-gods, and so on.  By mid-week, some force of evil would have successfully kidnapped the princess (or, on some weeks, the prince, who often behaved as the prototypical princess would be expected to, whereas the princess would often be the one stuck doing her own rescuing).  By the weekend, things were usually wrapped up neatly, peace restored in the form of treaties signed, villains vanquished, and feasts prepared in celebration.

“My liege,” the Royal advisor said, his words hindered by a rather unfortunate stammer.  “You were right about the schedule.  Something seems a touch, a bit, a smidge wrong.”  King Andral stood from his throne.

“I suspected as much,” he said quietly as he walked to one of the small windows that overlooked the castle’s northern-facing bridge.  The cacophony outside was being generated by a decent-sized band of Kuldarian Hell-Bandits, who were known for their unparalleled brutality in combat, flair for the dramatic, and obsession with what they referred to as “war jewelry”.  The multitude of piercings on each warrior’s head caught the sunlight just right that the bridge, from above, appeared to have been coated in quicksilver.

“My goodness,” King Andral said.  “What a rowdy bunch this is.  Dreadfully shiny, too.”  He walked toward the chamber doors, his gait slow and deliberate.  He stopped, only briefly, placing a work-worn hand on the massive oak door.

“My liege,” the Advisor said.  “Surely you aren’t thinking of going out there, are you?”

“Not due until next week, yes?” King Andral said, glancing over his shoulder.  Tufts of his beard and mustache obscured the King’s facial features, making him difficult to read.

“You know the Schedule better than anyone else, my lord.”  The king huffed another heavy, highly royal sigh, and pushed the door open.  Once the door had closed behind the King, the Royal Advisor, sprinted to the nearest north-facing window to watch.

The front gate opened after several long minutes, and out stepped King Andral.  His face was a deep crimson, and his breath was almost loud enough to be heard over the Hell-Bandits’ war-screams.

“Yargh,” said one of the more heavily-pierced, decorated Kuldarians.  “The king shows himself!  Let’s gut him and make him into a stew!”  Another Kuldarian, more decorated still, stepped out in front, smacking the previous speaker hard upside his head.

“Yergh,” he said.  “No.  That’s revolting.  My gods, who even let this man join our ranks?”  He looked back to his comrades in arms, an eyebrow raised.  King Andral waited, so as to not offend.

After as much waiting as a member of any royal family could endure, King Andral cleared his throat.

“Yergh,” said the Kuldarian, who then turned back to face the King.  “I am Grom-takk, and these are my mightiest men.  We’ve come to claim the princess so as to repopulate the once-prosperous valley-nation of Kuldarras.”  King Andral pinched his nose, adjusting his glasses afterward.

“While that does sound like a noble cause,” he said, “I’m afraid you won’t be doing that.”  The crowd roared with a mix of enthusiastic disagreement and a number of curse-words the King had never been overly fond of hearing, but had grown accustomed to over the course of his time on the throne.

“Yargh,” said the one Kuldarian, stepping forward with a jagged saber raised above his head.  “Big words for such a puny man.”  King Andral rolled his eyes.

“Not even the most boot-kissing of my knights would call me puny,” King Andral said, making a great sweeping gesture to indicate his Royal rotundity.  “And you’ll keep such thoughts of my daughter to yourselves.  You lot aren’t even supposed to be here until next week, anyway.”  The king gathered his composure, straightened up, and cleared his throat.  Grom-Takk scratched his heavily-bejeweled head.  After a heavy silence, Gromm-Takk snapped his fingers.  The crowd of warriors parted, and a small, bespectacled man made his way through.  He had minimal tattoos on his bald head, and a small satchel belted around his waist.

“I’m afraid, my most fierce lord,” the man said, producing a parchment from its carrying case.  “Says here we’re not due for another half a fortnight, as the Dread Wyrm Tsonira will have kidnapped her fair majesty.”  Much murmuring of discontent could be heard in the ranks of the Hell-Bandits.  The king sighed, checking his wrist-bound sundial.

“Off you go, then,” King Andral said, waving his arms to shoo the heavily-armed warriors away.  “If tonight goes anything like I suspect it will, my daughter will be returning shortly.  Blood-stained and battle-worn, no doubt.  Have you any idea how difficult it is to get dragon’s blood-burns out of stone?  Now, off with you.  I’ll see you lot next week.”